Thursday, March 22, 2012

Which part of "Hug & Go" do you not understand?

Lady in the maroon Escalade who parked your ginormous gas guzzler at the ass end of the drop off lane by the Kindergarten rooms for a good 5 minutes whilst dicking around in your vehicle and not dropping off a Kindergartener and then finally pulling through to the front of the line past all the empty curb space you had been ignoring to drop off a 5th grader, I am talking to you!

Seriously! What. The. Fuck? 

Drop off/pick up at my kids' school is a nightmare. My kids make fun of me, because from the safety and comfort of my own car I spend every morning explaining to the other parents how to use the drop off lane effectively and efficiently. The other parents can't hear me of course, but even if they could it wouldn't matter, because people are asshats.

The school does a good job of trying to make things run smoothly. There are 2 lanes running the same direction through the parking lot. The one next to the curb is for stopping and dropping off the students. "Hug & Go" people. It's on all the signs! The other lane is for getting the hell outta there. After dropping your precious bundles off, you should pull into the outer lane and exit the parking lot. Simple, yes? Apparently not. 

The Principal and/or a teacher as well as students in bright orange vest are along the curb encouraging people to pull all the way through to keep the traffic flowing, yet people still stop at the back end to let out their Kinders jamming up the line into the street rather than pulling through to the farthest available curb space. It's an extra maybe 30 feet for the kid to walk back. If you are concerned that your kid might wander in the wrong direction and you need a visual of them walking in their classroom, might I suggest parking, getting your ass out of the car and walking them in. The best is when people park their car in the drop off lane and proceed to get out of their car with the kid to walk them to class. 

It would be easier on the blood pressure to park on the street, get out and walk the kids in, but Kindergarten starts at 7:40 in the a.m. and I much prefer to roll through the drop off lane in my pajamas. 

This morning, while I spent an eternity wedged between the nonmoving Caddy & some poor innocent parent behind me practically on my bumper just trying to get out of the street and into the drop off lane, I came oh so close to taking my sage advice out of my car and directly to the woman in the Escalade so clearly in need of my assistance. I considered laying on my horn and decided that would be pretty obnoxious and then I contemplated getting out of my car, knocking on her window and imparting my wisdom upon her. 2 things stopped me. 

1. I would be setting a terrible example leaving my car parked in the drop off lane during "hug & go" time.


2. I was in my robe.

Peace, love & deep breaths ;-)

1 comment:

  1. I'm laughing so hard that I'm crying. I go through this exact thing EVERY DAY.


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